That wobbly middle bit between winter and spring where it’s still cold enough to freeze your niptips off and the flowers are hiding?

Yeah, March can get in the bin.

We’re setting our emails to OOO and heading to Tenerife for 7 nights for just £526pp. We’ll be staying at a luxurioooous hotel next to the beaches and it’s half board... Don’t be jel. Join us.

Tenerife, eh?

Like a bag of Skittles. Something for everyone.

You’re just a short skip down the coast from classy, Costa Adeje. Adventurous type? Snow-capped Mount Teide is ideal for calf-shredding hikes. Night owls should follow the strobe stick to Playa de la Americas

Where will I sleep?

The hotel might be called the Vanilla Garden Boutique… but there’s nothing plain about this place.

Sunny poolside terraces with whitewashed cabanas, whirlpool baths, and 3D TVs. This place is adults-only so look forward to the sound of waves splashing, ice clinking in cocktails… and Pam going on a mad one cos it’s her first holiday without the kids.

What will I do?

Take the five-minute stroll to Bike Point Tenerife and hire an e-bike to tick off the cluster of beaches closest to you, starting with Playas de Troya.

Worked up an appetite? Let nonna feed you. La Bruschetta de Viviana y Cristina is a cosy Italian cellar with wine-lined walls and saucy pasta dishes. It’s just a two-minute walk away. Or, try Restaurante Balkonen for arayes (Lebanese bread stuffed with mince), tabule (salad spiked with parsley), and batata harra (potatoes with garlic).

You're a nine-minute stumble to Monkey Beach Club. Go for ocean views, classy tiki bar vibes, and alllll the champagne.

Exactly what’s included?

• 7 nights at Vanilla Garden Boutique Hotel
• Hotel with pool and gym
• Return flights from your choice of airport
• Tap 'Departure Airports' to change
• COVID testing packages from only £20pp
• ATOL protected

Offer in partnership with Tui Holidays, see terms and conditions here.