“I took a pill in Ibiza…”

Alright, Mike Posner’s made a song about it but there’s more to this Balearic island than sweating viciously to Groove Armada.

The pre-summer season is the prime time to explore this beautiful old island before the house heads flood the scene.

Eivissa (Ibiza Town) is the opposite of a plastic resort. It’s all cobbled slopes, olive oil markets and medieval walls. And it’s got a UNESCO badge to prove it.

1. Beaches

For beaches away from the throbbing bass-lines, Cala Xarraca and Cala Xuclar are neighbours out in the wilderness.

Cala d’Hort’s a good middle-ground beach - it's got a cafe and deckchairs, but you shouldn’t see anyone gurning at 11am.

Formentera Island is Ibiza’s shy little sister. Hop on an aquabus for screensaver worthy beaches and snorkelling with all the fishies.

2. Culture

It's all about Eivissa's castle and cathedral. They were built in 1554 but still dominate Eivissa's skyline, looking all strong and pretty. Climb up and take in all that old-ness.

The Museum of Contemporary Art will help you feel superior to everyone else on the plane home - there's archaeological ruins from the 6th century BC...

3. Hungry?

Get yourself a bowl of steamy traditional fish stew at Sa Brisa. It's garlicky fish + garlic potatoes + garlic oil. Yes please.

4. Drinks n Dancing

Sure, you might end up at Pacha with your arms round a recruiter called Danny. But start the night with good intentions at Kumharas or Hidden Bar for chilled out cocktails. Teatro Pererya (an ex-theatre) has live music and margaritas.

Sum Up

'Beefa' has way more going for it than twats popping pingers. Avoid them with ease by going after the summer and sticking to areas built before 1960.